333–24 Years Ago…

Twenty-four years ago at this exact time my life changed forever. I became a mom and nothing about my life has been the same ever since.  I see things differently.  I think things differently. I feel things differently.

I started a journal (and I’m ashamed to admit I did a horrible job of keeping up with it) when I found out I was pregnant with Kale.  (I started another one for Tyler when I realized we were pregnant again.)

Here are a few things from some early entries…

[On being pregnant with him]  I loved you from the moment I suspected you were there. I fed you, talked to you, patted you, rubbed you, and treated you as if you were already born.  I don’t think there was one unhappy moment of pregnancy.

[On knowing he was a boy – I never had an ultrasound]  I knew all along you were a boy!  I had your room painted blue 5 months into my pregnancy.

[On how big he was – 9 lbs. 8 oz. at birth]  You are over 2 months old now, wearing 12 month outfits, and I can’t imagine how we ever made it without you. You are the love of our lives… all 16 pounds of you!

[On how special our relationship is] I feel so connected to you. We are very close. I hope that never changes.  My love for you grows with every breath you take. You are such a good boy and good friend.

I am still amazed at how the character traits and personality of both of my boys has remained the same from infancy until now.  The words I used to describe Kale as a baby and young boy are still true about him today…sweet, sensitive, caring, loving, funny, trustworthy, very intelligent, a leader, independent, respectful, head strong, responsible to name a few. 

I used to think about how the years ahead of me would bring change and my little boys, who were so dependent on me, wouldn’t need me any more.  I  worried that would mean loneliness and emptiness for me.  I never, in my wildest dreams, imagined that as that happened our relationships would change into something even better.  I am blessed to be Kale’s mom and even more blessed that we are the best of friends.

On his 8th birthday, I finished my entry with these words… they are still true today:

You are certainly a wonderful, special and loving young man! And I am the luckiest Mom on earth!!

Happy Birthday, Kale David!! We love you!